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Showing posts with label children. Show all posts
Showing posts with label children. Show all posts

Friday, February 7, 2025

Elder abuse a ticking time bomb

 

Fraught final chapter: The country could soon face an ageing population crisis, warns Kuan.

Rise in mistreatment of seniors needs immediate solutions, say experts

PETALING JAYA: While respect and care for the elderly are fundamental in Asian traditions, disturbing cases of elder abuse challenge this notion.

Two years ago, in Sungai Besi, a man in his 60s was found near death after being abandoned at a cemetery by a family member. Starved and dehydrated, he survived for days by consuming his own waste before dying in hospital.

In Kepong, several years earlier, an octogenarian was forced to live in her yard after her son, angered by her asset distribution among siblings, drove her out. A kind stranger eventually took her to a shelter.

Last year in Kedah, a couple in their 60s, who had supported their son, his wife and a newborn, were kicked out from their own home. The son, allegedly influenced by his wife, sent them to Kuala Lumpur on a bus, leaving them destitute and forcing them to survive on the streets.

These stories highlight a growing and distressing trend of neglect and abuse against the elderly, who deserve care and respect.

Social activist and philanthropist Kuan Chee Heng, who operates a free ambulance service in the Klang Valley and is deeply committed to helping the elderly, has witnessed countless cases of seniors being stripped of their savings and heartlessly abandoned by their families or caregivers.

Having assisted hundreds of abandoned elderly individuals over the past decade, the charity worker warns that without swift and effective action by the government, the country could soon face an ageing population crisis.

“I am sickened by these cases, and it makes me really sad to see these abuses occurring regularly. It is time for us to protect the aged with a law that compels their families to care for them and penalises those who neglect them,” Kuan said, adding that the country direly needs to pass the Senior Citizens Bill.

In 2023, Women, Family and Community Development Minister Datuk Seri Nancy Shukri said the Senior Citizens Bill, aimed at safeguarding the rights and well-being of the elderly, has been drafted. The Bill is expected to include provisions for legal action and penalties against adult children who neglect their responsibilities toward their parents.

Additionally, the Bill seeks to protect the rights and well-being of senior citizens and empower the elderly community.

According to Kuan, the nation is facing situations where both parents and their children are in their golden years.

“Living past 70, they have exhausted their savings and have children who have a family of their own to care for and are struggling themselves to make ends meet,” he said.

Kuan suggested the government work closely with corporations and religious and charitable organisations to develop shelters for old folks at existing venues that are underutilised.

“Many temples have large compounds, and this can be used to house them. Government-run vocational training should also include courses that specialise in the management of the elderly, and these graduates can be tasked to take charge of these centres,” he said.

Experts studying the challenges of the ageing population emphasise the need for legal, social and ethical solutions.

“Strengthening the rights of the aged, providing financial protections combined with social support and awareness is key to addressing this growing crisis,” said psychologist and counsellor Assoc Prof Dr Fauziah Mohd Saad of Universiti Pendidikan Sultan Idris (UPSI).

She said diminished mental capacity due to conditions such as dementia or Alzheimer’s disease impairs an individual’s decision-making abilities, rendering them easy targets and highly susceptible to abuse by close family members or caregivers.

“Seniors who live alone or are dependent on a limited number of individuals for support may be subjected to abuse, as such isolation makes it easier for exploiters to manipulate them without interference.

“Financial abuse can also occur as a result of strained relationships, greed or a ‘sense of entitlement’. Children or relatives may take advantage and plunder an elder’s savings and assets, sometimes justifying it as inheritance in advance,” she said, as elderly individuals could place unconditional trust in family members or caregivers.

Fauziah advised that seniors, with the assistance of trusted family members, should take proactive steps to protect their savings and assets, especially when experiencing cognitive decline.

She said setting up a trust or will with clear legal guidelines can prevent unauthorised transfer of assets.

“Assigning the power of attorney to a trustworthy person ensures financial decisions are made in their best interest. Instead of relying on a single family member, there should be several other individuals they trust or can rely on to assist and guide them, making sure they do not make decisions under duress. Instilling awareness on scams and manipulation will also help them safeguard their assets,” Fauziah said.

She emphasised the need for elderly individuals to have an easy way to report abuse without fearing repercussions or retaliation, adding that authorities should actively promote helplines and provide dedicated legal aid.

She said a more effective approach could involve establishing a government-monitored support fund for neglected seniors and implementing laws that impose penalties for elder neglect, including financial restitution.

“In some countries, those who abandon their elderly parents have their names published. Although it is controversial, it can serve as a deterrent. Social pensions and public housing for abandoned old folks should also be considered,” Fauziah said.

Prof Dr Intan Hashimah Mohd Hashim of Universiti Sains Malaysia (USM) said developing positive relationships within a family could also instil compassion and empathy among younger members.

“Elderly abuse is less likely to occur in a family where its members are kind and considerate with each other. Caregivers should also receive emotional support because they may suffer stress and burnout, which are two factors that often lead to abuse of senior folks,” the psychologist said. - By CHARLES RAMENDRAN, THE STAR


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Wednesday, September 15, 2021

A great Malaysian tragedy

Funeral of children who died

Questions about Malaysia's treatment of this minority:The runaway children Malaysia failed to ...

 
Young, impoverished mother from Chinese viral photo finally found after 11 years, and how different her life is now | The Star
 

THIS is one article that I didn’t want to write. I put off writing it for two years. Writing 900 words about this subject was more painful than taking three years to write a 100,000-word thesis. I would do three more theses if I could avoid writing these next 900 words.

This article is about a tragedy that concerns us as a people and a nation. The tragedy should have sparked a national debate, but it was ignored despite being repeated four times.

What is this great tragedy, you might ask? Is it the May 13 race riots in 1969? Is it the Bukit Kepong incident in 1950? Is it the first riot in 1964 in Singapore before it left the federation? Is it the fall of a government? Or is it the dismal state of our institutions of education, justice and administration?

To me, all of these things combined fail to measure up to the tragedy I am about to describe.

Two years ago I happened to read a news article about an Indian-Malaysian family whose father killed all of his children. The report related how the mother died of cancer a few days before and the father, who was jobless and also in poor health, had become distraught. He ended up killing his 15-year-old son and three other children by strangling them all. After that horrifying deed, he hanged himself.

I could not sleep well for several days after reading about that, wondering why a father would kill his children. What drove him to do that? The police and other authorities dismissed it as the act of a crazy man. I did not think so.

Two weeks later, there was a report of another destitute Indian-Malaysian family whose parent, also suffering from an illness, killed the children. Again, the authorities dismissed it as “orang gila punya kerja” (a mad person’s act).

Several months later, I read of Chinese-Malaysian parents who poisoned their four little children and then themselves. At the last minute, an ambulance was called, but all the children died; the parents survived.

And just last week, a penniless father, whose race was not stated, smothered his three children after his wife died.

After each of these cases, our nation went on with business as usual. No professors from our 200 universities raised the issue. No religious clerics from any religion made it into a social and political issue. No NGO stood up and demonstrated or wrote press statements about the tragedies.

Was I the only one who cringed at the news of parents killing their children? Was I the only one to ask questions?

Firstly, why did these parents not seek help from other family members? All of us have wider family circles and if we begged several of them to care for one child each, surely they would respond? I have no issue whatsoever if adults decide to take their own lives, but I am aghast and crushed when children are killed just because one cannot figure out how to feed and care for them.

All children in this country – and the world – should be cared for and given a minimum chance to survive until they can make their own way. Is that not a social, political and spiritual right? What happened to the larger family system if parents think that it would burden other family members?

Then I asked the question: why did the parents not seek help from the leaders of their own race or religion? We have political leaders of all races and houses of worship worth millions. What is the purpose of religion and these splendid displays of architectural feats if parents had no faith that they could get help from going to a church, a mosque, a temple or a gurdwara to ask congregants to help their children?

If I were the parent, I would have taken them to the mosque and begged for help and asked to stay at the mosque. I would help sweep the floor of the mosque or scrub its toilets and then ask restaurants for leftovers so I could feed my children and myself. There is no shame in that. But, of course, I would ask for help from my own family and wife’s family first before going that far.

Finally, I asked: what should our government do for such families? Why did the four families not go to a zakat office or the Welfare Department for help? Why did they have no confidence in our institutions, orphanages and other forms of welfare? What are these zakat or welfare officers doing? Why are they not proactively walking the streets and looking under bridges for the homeless or talking to people in low-cost flats to see if there are families facing destitution?

I wish the four families had reached out to the media or someone for help instead of killing their children. What does it say about our nation when parents kill their children instead of trusting our institutions of race, institutions of religion and institutions of governance?

When I was in the United Kingdom, I was given a financial allowance for my four children. When I was in the United States, I was given food stamps when my daughter was born. I also remember watching a report on YouTube about 400,000 unemployed British youngsters given £250 (about RM1,400 at current rates) a month as a benefit back then.

I spent nine years overseas and I never read about parents killing their children because of poverty. What does it say about our country, our people and our faiths when four tragedies like these can happen – and that they raised not one iota of concern? We are, truly and sadly, a nation that is failing its most vulnerable people.


Prof Dr Mohd Tajuddin Mohd RasdiProf Dr Mohd Tajuddin Mohd Rasdi is Professor of Architecture at UCSI University. The views expressed here are entirely the writer’s own.

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Wednesday, June 9, 2021

Covid-19 Cases going down; top priority – keep the kids safe

 Malaysia's Cases going down to below R1  

 

PETALING JAYA: Malaysia is seeing a dip in the Covid-19 infectivity rate. Though this is encouraging, health experts caution the public against taking their foot off the pedal.

Universiti Putra Malaysia medical epidemiologist Assoc Prof Dr Malina Osman said the downward trend proved that the preventive measures put in place were effective.

“Our steps to control the outbreak are on track but we have to continue this effort to reduce it further.

“It is a good sign, but if we loosen our grip, the number of infections is set to potentially increase, ” she said.

Dr Malina added that while the country’s R value was showing a decline, the aim would be to push it down to near zero.

The R value, or reproduction number, refers to the infectivity rate of a virus at a particular point in time.

It represents the average number of people an infected person could spread the disease to, so an R value of lower than 1 means that the number of people being infected on average will be fewer over time.

Health director-general Tan Sri Dr Noor Hisham Abdullah said the R value had dropped to below 1 during the first week of the lockdown.

Yesterday, it was recorded at 0.99.

On May 31, before the two-week lockdown was implemented, it was 1.09.

Previously, the R value was also recorded at levels of 1.21 and 1.16, on May 23 and May 29, respectively.

International Islamic University Malaysia epidemiologist Prof Dr Jamalludin Ab Rahman said while the R value did show a positive impact, it was not enough.

Malaysia was not out of the woods yet, he said.

“R alone is not enough. For example, we should look at fatality rates, or the number of new clusters.

“Should we be happy with an R value that is lower than 1?

“Yes. But is the effort enough? Not yet, ” Dr Jamalludin pointed out.

“The R value has to be persistently low. Until when? There is no precise answer.”

He said that while the MCO and lockdown had reduced mobility among the general population considerably, Malaysia was still seeing transmissions in factories.

“The government really needs to settle this source of infections.

“The movement control order can solve sporadic cases in the community but if factories are still operating and close contact in crowded spaces is not being controlled, we will continue to have cases from factories, ” he added.

Universiti Kebangsaan Malaysia epidemiologist Assoc Prof Dr Azmi Mohd Tamil agreed.

He said that unless a relational database – where all secondary cases were mapped out to each primary case – it would not be possible to get the accurate average number of secondary persons infected from a single primary case.

“What we have is only an estimate based on a mathematical model.

“As long as we have cases in the community, the outbreak will continue – until the majority of the population is immune to the disease.”

At present, Dr Azmi said, “all possible cases of Covid-19 need to be screened, identified and isolated from the susceptible population”.

He reckoned that the lockdown should not be lifted on June 14.

“The number of cases does not support that – even though the R value is currently below 1, ” he added

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Top priority – keep the kids safe



PETALING JAYA: Spending almost two weeks in hospital after testing positive for Covid-19 last year is something housewife Sharifah Farah Ayuni Syed Rosli does not want to go through again – ever.Now, she and her husband have only one important thing in mind – to look after and protect their three children from being infected.

“That harrowing experience was enough to jolt us. We hope neither we nor our kids get infected by the disease,” said the 30-year-old from Kota Baru.

Recalling her stay, Sharifah said she spent about 13 days in hospital with her businessman husband Mohd Azlee Che Mohd Zaid and their son, Mir Ali Zafar, who was three months old at the time.

While she was well cared for by medical workers there, the housewife said she was mentally exhausted thinking about her two other children, who tested negative and placed in their grandmother’s care.

“Nowadays, I get a little anxious if I feel unwell, worrying if I contracted Covid-19 again.

“Thankfully, we are all healthy. We understand that we must stay at home to guard against getting infected,” she said.

Recently, Health director-general Tan Sri Dr Noor Hisham Abdullah said there was a rise in infections among younger children, some of whom had to be treated at intensive care units.

Sharifah said she and her husband tried to set good examples for their three children, now aged six, four and one-and-a-half, and remind them to wash their hands and wear their face masks properly.

She said her children understood that they could not go for outings because of the pandemic.

“We are grateful that they are obedient and follow our advice.

“There are times when they get upset and sulk, as children sometimes do, but they listen,” Sharifah said.

Kiranjit Muniandy wonders if she is doing enough to protect her 19-month-old daughter from getting infected.

“The number of kids getting infected of late is alarming. It’s tougher now because she is at that age where she just wants to touch everything,” she said.

Kiranjit, 39, was also worried about the high number of new cases daily.

“My husband and I have decided not to go out and stay at home.

“We have also stopped receiving visitors. We take care of our daughter while we work from home.

“Thankfully, we work on shifts. My husband works in the day while I work at night so we take turns,” said the banking executive.

Kiranjit said she would take every precaution to protect her family from being infected and hoped that the pandemic would end soon as she misses her family in Sabah.

“My daughter has not met her grandparents for over a year,” she said.

Faster herd immunity if kids are jabbed too - PressReader

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Monday, February 15, 2021

Choosing a good executor for your will

“It is a certainty but the Asian culture fails to talk about death adequately. Many times, the parents don’t really talk about this to their children. Such as, when a parent passes away, who will be in charge of the family’s business, ” Rockwills Advisory Services Sdn Bhd’s general manager and associate estate planning practitioner ason Tham told StarBiz.

 

DEATH is an issue nobody likes to talk about, but it is a certainty in this life.

This is likely due to the Asian culture where death is a rarely or openly discussed subject among families which could lead to complications later on for the loved ones.

“It is a certainty but the Asian culture fails to talk about death adequately. Many times, the parents don’t really talk about this to their children. Such as, when a parent passes away, who will be in charge of the family’s business, ” Rockwills Advisory Services Sdn Bhd’s general manager and associate estate planning practitioner Jason Tham told StarBiz.

“Many times, the children are also helping out in the family business and as the founder and business owner it is difficult for the parents to say that they are their children’s boss and parent at the same time. While in some other instances, siblings may be unhappy if parents outrightly choose one over the other to take over the family business.

"A lot of people have an inkling that this is an important topic to talk about but they don’t know where to start, ” Tham added.

He noted that recent business trends for Rockwills have indicated that awareness among Malaysians on the importance of writing a will have been on the rise as business volume in this area have grown.

Writing one’s will in advance will also help ease the transition for a person’s loved ones in terms of matters pertaining to inheritance.

Other than the importance of being more open in discussing death, Tham said it is important for a person to choose a good executor for the will.

“The executor will be acting on a person’s (demised) will. So appointing a capable executor is a very important task and a common mistake made by many is to overlook this part of choosing a capable executor. Some of the characteristics to look out for in a capable executor is that the person must be reliable and trustworthy, ” Tham said.

“Some good examples of a good executor can be a person’s spouse. Since this is a person whom you can trust and this person would know and can execute your wishes in regards to inheritance.

“We must also know that this person chosen will continue to be in existence, ” he added.

Tham explained that continuing to be in existence generally means that as a general guideline, one should try not to appoint their parents as their will executors.

“Most likely a person’s parents would be much older and the chances of them continuing to be in existence would be lower.

“If there are no untoward or unexpected incidences, most likely your parents will pass away before you. An executor will execute a person’s will when a person is gone, ” he said.

Tham said usually, a family member will be selected as executors and they are usually candidates that would naturally be a priority.

“In some cases, a person might require a neutral body to execute a person’s will and this is when a professional estate planning firm may come in handy, ” he said.

“One example when this may be applicable is when a father would like to give his inheritance to his children but they are not on good terms with each other.

“So it is very difficult for the client to appoint one of them to be executors since they would likely be biased and it can create more fights among them. So this is when a licensed trustee is useful to carry out the demised’s will wishes, ” Tham said.

A licensed trustee can also help carry out a person’s wishes in the event that both parents are not around with minors or offsprings who are not yet considered adults, he said.

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Saturday, January 30, 2021

Block out background Zoom noise

Bothered by the background noise of Zoom calls? Here’s how to block it out



https://youtu.be/w7du4bng31I 




Teachers on Zoom calls with students ages five to eight who are at home or in daycare might find this a familiar bugbear: the sounds of other children, siblings, parents and barking dogs. 

The students have noise-canceling headphones that block the noise for them, but not so much the teachers.

In addition, some students use iPads that have a plug for their headphones but no plug for a noise-cancelling external microphone (headphones that include microphones are expensive).

If this is what you’re facing, block the background racket by using noise-cancelling software instead of noise-canceling microphones.

There are two types of this software: The Zoom video call app, which has controls for cancelling out background noise at the student’s end of the conversation, and third-party programs for your computer that cancel out student background noise before the sound plays through your computer’s speaker.

In order to use the Zoom noise-cancelling feature, your students must connect to the call via the Zoom app on their iPads (as opposed to connecting without the app through the Zoom website).

In addition, an adult must examine the app’s settings to make sure they aren’t set to “original sound”, which means background noise is not filtered out. Toggling off “original sound” automatically turns on background noise cancellation. (For directions, clic here.)

Unfortunately, the noise-cancellation feature in the iPad Zoom app has its limits. Unlike the computer app, the iPad app doesn’t let you adjust to block specific types of sounds. It also doesn’t allow noise cancellation to be increased or decreased.

A better solution may be to download a third-party noise-cancellation program to the PC or Mac that you use for Zoom sessions. The app most suited to your needs is probably Krisp, which can filter out student background noise before you hear it. Krisp is free to use for up to 120 minutes a week; unlimited use costs US$5 (RM20) a month. (See details here and downloads here). – Star Tribune (Minneapolis)/Tribune News Service

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Saturday, December 5, 2020

Sheer joy of parenting

 What the writer and his wife love about being parents is that their children have enhanced their lives in so many ways

To the writer and his wife, parenthood is their greatest achievement although they have experienced difficult trials along the way.

FINANCIAL reasons is the normal excuse given by some who are not willing to have children. This is shocking.

Sure, having kids will affect our budget but that should not be the reason for not having children, or at least one child. To those who do not want to have children, I have reasons to change your mind.

When my wife, who was then earning as much as I did, decided to forego her job as a bank officer and concentrate on being a mother, it was our decision to prioritise our children’s upbringing rather than focus on our financial standing. We knew then that we really had to tighten our belts, but with careful planning, we survived.

Nothing else can produce the joy that parenthood offers. I can’t imagine going through life without feeling that spectrum of emotions. Feeling it all, good and bad, gives our lives as a married couple more purpose and challenges.

There is the pure joy of just watching our children be kids and reliving all those first moments when they discover how to do things on their own. Their smiles, giggles and pride in new accomplishments, even though some may be mischief in nature, were a sheer pleasure to watch.

As the sole income earner in the family, I could have had the worst day at work, but to come home and listen to our children, discuss their day with my wife, or to overhear them giggle while playing or watching television makes the worst day disappear.

I was 33 when I had my first kid. Though my first child wasn’t born normal, having children was such a life-altering experience. My wife and I were always looking for a purpose in our lives and when we had our children, we found it.

We love being parents. Seeing them do well in their studies and behaviour-wise, we know we are doing right thus far. That doesn’t mean we don’t have our share of mistakes but we are better persons for knowing our children and are very honoured to be their parents.

My wife and I love being parents because of the hugs, giggles and grins. When our kids are happy, so are we. As they grew, they amazed us every day with their new words, behaviour and discoveries. They have taught us to be more patient, more loving and much more appreciative of every moment we have together as a family.

Parenthood is a joy. Even while experiencing the hardest trials of our lives, we have learned to rise to all occasions. We’ve found ourselves lifted to new heights while stretching ourselves beyond our limits once we put it upon ourselves to guide them. With rarely a dull moment, we’ve experienced more adventures from parenting our children than we ever imagined.

Parenthood is our life, our passion and our greatest achievement. We also love watching our kids evolve into empathetic, kind human beings who can think for themselves, like spending their money thriftily and being involved in various school activities. You don’t realise the progress until far down the road but the wait is so worthwhile.

We don’t deny that parenthood is a hectic life filled with schedules, diaper changes, feedings, spendings and much more. There are so many things we love about being parents, but the one that stops us dead in our tracks is when each of our children turn to us and say, “Ayah Mi” (referring to me) and “Mak” (referring to my wife).

We love the fact that when our children were growing up to be adults, we were beside them every step of the way, teaching, helping, moulding and loving them.

Life may be great for those who do not want to have children but life will be even better once they have been blessed to become parents.

What we love about being parents is that our children have enhanced our lives in so many ways. We are a better husband, a better wife, better employees, neighbours, relatives and friends. We would rather have our worst days with our kids than to have our best days without them.

By DR ARZMI YAACOB

Monday, September 7, 2020

The dark reality: education, teachers, children, helicopter parents, Covid-19, unjust lawsuits,society, media, 如所解释的,不要抱怨杀死你的老公 ...

2+2=22

The videos below show a teacher telling a student that he failed because he wrote the incorrect answer – that 2 + 2 equals 4, not 22. In his frustration, he throws a tantrum in the classroom. When the parents are called in to discuss the situation, they also throw a tantrum, claiming there is more than one answer to any question.....










Coronavirus: Covid-19

 


Covid 19 Origin #0 patient




Grandma Goes Off on Trump

 

 

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FAILURE:

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